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Uncool Runnings.

September 3, 2009 8 Comments


Running isn’t always pretty. And if you’re me, it’s never pretty. I mean, I’ve heard of people who don’t sweat when they exercise.

I hate them.

Unequivocally.

But it’s not just about the sweat. My biggest fear going into the Couch to 5k program was that people were going to see me run. It’s not easy for me. Nothing about it is graceful. I was calculating the odds that my neighbors would pool their resources to buy me a treadmill so no one would ever again have to watch the akward that is Emily plodding up and down the street. Especially when Emily has to pick her shorts out of her crotch because they won’t. quit. riding. up. (My apologies to the guy in the stupid Escalade, but yes it had to be done. And yes it had to be done right then.)

Also, I’m waiting somewhat impatiently for an armband for my iPod. (I thought I’d save a few bucks by ordering one online.) So there I was after work yesterday. Determined to get back to my interval training but minus a running buddy and in desperate need of a Couch to 5k podcast to keep me on track. So what could I do but shove a 30 GB iPod video down my sports bra? I did a few jumping jacks in the living room, and when it didn’t come flying out, I took off down the street.

The bad news is I made running look painful. The good news is that I finished without hurting my knees.

Who knows? Maybe one day I’ll make running look easy.

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About Emily Suess

Emily Suess is a freelance marketing copywriter in Indianapolis, Indiana and a regular contributor at Small Business Bonfire.
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  • GrizzBabe

    Have you seen those cute running skirts? Maybe that would help with creeppage.

  • Dawn

    My friend who runs says that you have to go commando or wear a cotton thong and shorts a size too big. I don't know… me and running have never worked. I would get a black eye for sure… lol

    I think it is totally amazing that you are doing this! You rock.

    be well…

  • Effie

    Love your blog and your sense of humor. I also have a C25K blog, complete with self-depreciating (sometimes self-deficating) humor: http://effieruns.blogspot.com.

  • Beth

    Ugh, wedgies are no fun! I don't know if those workout skirts would work or not…they probably have shorts inside, like skorts, which might still be wedgie-inducing. But they might not ride up as bad as undies. Glad you were able to get out again!

  • Bucko (a.k.a., Ken)

    Umm, well, you know, it is just, kind of you know, but then again, it is so… :o )

  • Chris

    That's why I run in the nude. No wedgies. Plus it really keeps my running times up. You'll be surprised how fast you can run when the police are chasing you;)

  • Guttermouth

    I actually found the "follow" button this time. :-)

  • Char

    Is there anything worse than a wedgie? And, when they are baaaad ones, you just gotta pull em out – in our out of traffic. Hope your knees are okay.